What not-so-sweet nicknames do you have for your kid(s)? I've seen reference to a "Destructo" on here, so I know I'm not the only one who's not just calling the kids things like Cutie Pie, etc.

Some of my twins' earliest nicknames were things like:
Squeak (for the fussier one)
Samurai Crab Carapace Face
Shrieky

My boys will both answer to "Rotten Kid" and "Monster" ... I'm pretty sure I'll be going to parenting hell when I die.

lol. makes me think of Bill Cosby's routine about thinking his name was "goddammit" until he was 8 years old.

Sailor calls Max Mawell Daemon on bad days. When Mo was little we called him Destructor.

The worst nicknames my kids have been called have been coined by my MIL. She adds a i to the end of everyones name. Shawni, Morgi, Maxi, and I hate them with a passion.

Luckily my brother in law thought Morgi was gross too and subtly switched it to Morgo.

MttM - I've been fighting the "y" versions of my sons' names forever.

Each of our kids, in turn, was called "Poophead" more or less until they were out of diapers, and then again in their teens.

I actually make up new nicknames for the kids on an almost daily basis, it has gotten so bad that they usually dont have any clue who I am talking about.

2nd kid I call Miss Chievous.

Professor Poopenmeier, but that was back when she was pooping on the newborn schedule. Now it's Monkey Butt.

The wife used to call the kid "Demon Seed" while in utero. I really hated that name.

I've called both of mine Stinky Bottom, or just Stinky, before, and I tried a few much less appropriate names, but Mr. S disapproves. He doesn't think it's appropriate for the mother of his children to call them non-complimentary names.

Chickenbutt. Little Monster. Booger.

One of the reasons we chose the name we did (Madeleine) is because it does not end in a long E sound. My husband's name does, his parents names do, his sister's and my brothers' do, and many more. It was time to stop the madness!! Of course, I had pregnancy brain, so I did not properly factor in familiar and diminutive forms. Like Maddie. Which is what everyone calls her, even me. Damn it.

Eh, I have a long e nickname, as does my child. I kind of dig it. We call our kid Smudgy or The Smudge. We have forever (that is, 18 months), since he was little and newborn and looked smudgy. It's not uncomplimentary, but it's not sweetheart or anything either. I have a lot of nicknames for him, but the less flattering ones aren't popping into my head for some reason. Heh.

When my boy was a baby, we used to call him Professor Fussybucket.

Now that he is 3, I call him by nicknames more often than his real name.

Not all of them sound so great to the casual observer:

His name is Atticus, which leads naturally to Boo, which leads to both Boozer and Boodle
I also call him Monkey, which leads to Monkey Shines and Monkey Pox

The spellings are all off on these but here you go:

Shmeegle (he had weight gain issues and big eyes)
Polpot ( as in the dictator-before he was born, Jimbo nicknamed him that)
Mr. Bean (I still call him that)
Bean-olicous
Snicklefritz
Fat Head
Bigguns
Fattimus

There are more...I'll probably have to post later though.

I, too use nicknames more then his real name. I don't think they are too negative. I am worried about what carries over into school. Currently Samalamadingdong is my favorite. Super-Sam is a common one. Oh right, Home-Slice, too.

We've got probably a half dozen each for either kid, but I call the one Boo boo (like yogi's sidekick) and the other (name)-loo-who, like Cindy-loo-who from the Grinch story.

El Destructo is mine. Love that damn kid to pieces but he leaves a wake of destruction in his path. It's kinda cool to watch actually...

His other nicknames are ... bud and stinko. He was peanut utnil about a yr old. If I really reall really want his attention... I have to use a first and middle name ALREADY the kid is only 18 months and he already knows that Mom means bid-ness when I say his middle name...

Mrs. Fussypants

I also tell here there's no crying in baseball, but she doesn't seem to care.

One of my friends calle her baby Cletus the Fetus until it was born.

Short Blond Troublemaker # (fill in number of child here).
When I'm pressed for time I usually shorten to Trouble, which they have to determine from context which of them I'm discussing (yelling at) at that time. I sometimes call SBT#2 the Menace, the Destructor, or That Kid That's Trying To Give His Father A Heart Attack.

When she is being whiny or fussy, some version of Crab.
Crab cake, crab apple, crab puff, crab legs, etc.

If she is being her normal self, then usually it's Monkey.

I also refer to my spouse as "Your Highness-ness" when I'm particularly grouchy. Surely I am not the only one ;-)

Soph-a-loaf.

Munchkin, Sweet Pea, Babe, Olliebel, Olivia Bolivia, Ellie, Lanie, goddammitwillyoupleasestopcrying, Shorty, and whatever else comes to minf at the moment.

Hamster. Crabby McCrankypants. Tooty Tot. Tater Tot.

Oh yeah, we do refer to him as our Overlord or the Tyrant sometimes.

I call Atticus Little Mr. and Bubba alot. He calls me Pops and Stink ( stink is always followed by a belly laugh.) I really don't know where stink comes from though. ( Do I smell that bad Lalena? ) Oh and Atticus's Grandpa Geoff calls him Radicus Mortificus.

CSNH- I just got overly excited that someone else here in O-land named their kid Atticus. Then I looked to see who it was. It all makes sense, now. Hi honey. I am still not used to seeing you around.

Drive by husband drop-in?

Poor The Girl has The Man's flat and almost entirely absent ass. So pants staying up, on either one, is an issue. I see a lot of crack at my house.

Either one can be called Toots McCracken on any day. And The Girl is Miss Pissy Pants when she's having a fit. Or Pissy Britches. Or Sassy Pants. Or Stinky Pants. Or Messy Pants.

Anything Pants.

TM, I call my sam Samalamadingdong too! Also Samalicious.

As for uncomplimentary, I call both of my boys knuckleheads on a regular basis. But in a nice way :) They both think it's hilarious.

I call my kids "Turd" when they are being particularly crotchety.

For Mo it's code to stop what he's doing, mostly beating up on his little brother.