Especially when your kids are little (mine are the youngest of the grandkids) it's hard to know how to strike a balance at a larger event... do you chase them every minute and watch them like a hawk, or trust that with the number of (theoretically) competent adults in the vicinity, that they'll be okay with less of your intervention?

Add into that the specifics of a family reunion. We'll be seeing cousins of mine that I might see every couple of years, and they live fairly close together. Their kids all know one another pretty well, and tend to rove in a couple of packs. Mine will sometimes join those packs, but...

I don't know these kids. They're mostly 10 and under, not particularly baby-sitterish, just ordinary kids looking to have an ordinary good time doing whatever it is that cousins do. Do I let my kids join the "pack" as it were, and hope for the best? Or do I insist that they stay apart and where I can see them?

What would you do and what criteria would you make your decision with? My kids are 6 and 3 (the newborn boob-shark is obviously not going to be mingling, obviously). My family is a mix of sane/awesome, slightly crazy and a lot crazy, but the craziest people there are not the parents of the littles.

Let 'em join the pack. Maybe tell them ahead of time to check in with you often. It will be fun for them, and they'll be exhausted by the end of the day. At least they'll sleep well.

I'd check out the lay of the land, let them know, in no uncertain terms, what their boundaries are and let 'em go with the pack. Check on them from time to time. Will the 6 y/o keep an eye out for the 3 y/o in case of trouble, at least to let you know what's going on?

10 and unders still do very well with little ones. Once they hit about 14, you would expect them to do better and be more babysitter ish, but even those that are baby sitters tend to think of this as a non-paid function where it isn't their job to give a shit what the other kids are doing. The best age is 11-13. Those kids, especially the girls or older-sibbling boys, are awesome kid ring-leaders/entertainers!

We spent the weekend at the beach for my dad's birthday. There is always a different mix of people when we go to his beach. This time my sister was there with her 2 friends (all 16-year-old girls). They were kind of in their own world most of the time. The adults were mostly in their late to early 50's. And there were two sets of parents with children under 10 (us and another couple).

My son was in heaven having a 5 1/2 year-old girl to play with. The 3-year-old was often not well enough supervised because my daughter was either in her own world, playing with the 5 and 6 kids, or trying to hang out with the adults and figure out what we were up to. I would let the 6 year-old go have fun, but either keep the 3-year-old close or within eye and earshot of a sober sane adult. Kids under 10 are still really good at not thinking of the safety of the little ones.

I'm with Sadie - turn the 6 year old lose after making sure a couple of the older kids know him by name and sight but keep the younger one closer.

let them join the pack, but first check and see if there are any potential hazards around that you want them to keep away from (fire pit, target shooting range, etc.)

Be careful if there's water nearby. If you can see them, I'm sure it's fine to let them run. My friend always says parties are dangerous because everyone thinks everyone else is watching the little kids and then nobody is... and anything can happen.

How big is your family reunion? Is it at someone's house or do you have to rent a small park to accomodate someone? That makes a difference in the expectation others have related to watching your kids. They would probably be less offended by kids running around in an outdoor area than in and out of aunt suzie's house.

I say let them run. Keep a closer eye on the young one, but the 6 year old can probably go free without too much trouble.

Sailor's family is huge. His father is one of 8 and at family gatherings we take up a lot of space. I took Mo to a wedding once when he was about 5 months old. At the reception there were about 60 close-ish relatives of my son. These people had know Sailor since before he was born. Anyway one of his cousins asked to hold Mo and I didn't see him for about 30 minutes the first time. He was being passed around. It freaked me out but then my MIL stepped in and sort of supervised while I got to know the matriarch Grandma Hauk.