http://tinyurl.com/6a7uf4

What do you do?

I'm a big disciplinarian and such things get dealt with firmly and quickly in my house. To date (eldest is 6) I've never been called out of my name by the boy. After an incident of him calling a peer a name (he was 4) we had a very serious conversation about slandering people and what the consequences were.

Wow, that story is a test of parenting patience if ever there was one. I probably would have called it a day after the cream puff incident one two of the idiot and the tongue sticking out. But who knows. My toddler smacked me three times this morning already.

B is a pretty good kid, and even when angry doesn't usually resort to name calling, preferring the old-fashioned "I hate you!" Aside from that, he generally seems to have a decent grip on his emotions.

As a parent of a teenager with a very bad attitude (seriously, some mental health issues) I keep trying to remind myself that "Fuck you, I hate you!" really means "I love you Mom, thank you for setting boundaries for me!".

Our toddler has picked up "Shut up" lately. We never use that word in our house, so I'm not sure where it came from. I'm pretty swift with timeouts every time I hear him say it...but it tests every ounce of patience I have not to shake him.

So far we haven't had that kind of encounter but I suspect that my reaction would not be pretty.

It hasn't happened yet. At age six, she's still principally about sweetness and cooperation. However, if she were to ask for a bottle of water instead of tap water after being petulant or insulting, I'd tell her she was wasting energy and money and contributing to the death of the planet.

N hasn't called me any names yet. Like MNM's B, he's more about the "I hate you" and apparently I'm the "meanest mommy in the world", but no name calling. It won't go over well at all if he starts, though.

And exactly, JTC. I wouldn't have gotten the bottled water. If the water fountain isn't good enough, then they must not be very thirsty. Hey, I am the meanest mommy in the world.

My son started a new school yesterday and even though he is supposed to have a one on one aide, especially for transitions like these, they did not have an aide for him. When I picked him up after school yesterday, the teacher told me he had had a hard first day. She said he was running around the classroom and she told him to sit down and he yelled at her and said, "you don't tell me what to do!" I learned very quickly when my son was 4 yrs. old and we were at the science center and he threw his first major fit, where he was kicking me and screaming because he didn't want to leave when it was time to go; that either I had to become a major disciplinarian or my kid was going to make my life a living hell. It wasn't easy but it worked and so it is always surprising to me when I hear that he has acted out when he was away from home, because he would never try something like that at home. It usually happens in a new situation and he is testing the limits to see what he can get away with. Thus the reason for the one on one aide to keep him in line. If he doesn't have very clear boudaries and rules he gets out of control. Good luck!

andromeda AKA mama AKA BAD MAMA!!!! yeah, haven't quite figured out how to put a stopper in it yet. he thinks that if he calls me "tad mama" or "bag mama" or any thing that rhymes with "bad mama", it's not punishable. HAHAHA! boy is he wrong. i try to discipline, but the child just laughs when i get angry. it's not from lack of understanding, it's that he is a clown who thinks that if he can make me laugh then he won't get in trouble. i just keep reminding myself that with the right comedic training, i too can be a mom of a guy on SNL one day. that, or the mom of a kid who has been kicked out of many schools.

Hmm... It might seem immature, but I usually say something back like "I know you are, but what am I?". Mine is six, and it seems like acting like a six year old in response to six year old antics gets me better results than acting like an angry grown-up.