sorry about that, folks.

http://tinyurl.com/5w5sfz

We have two of those. Not bright pink fortunately, but still annoying. We just let the batteries die and so far that has not been a problem. They will stay dead. He loves to ride it around, which I have no problem with.

Those stupid I-Spy books. They may not smash but they can burn!

when El D was an infant my mother (shakes fist in air) gift us with the ball made by Saten. Srsly. It shook, sang a horrible song, made animal noises, and frankly freaked me and The Surfer out.

http://www.vtechkids.com/product.cfm?productID=157

We often talked of bashing it a la "Office Space"...

Mine is the baby "personal playlist" mp3 player by... er... parents.com. The sound is crappy and the cockney children sing weird versions of classics I know. Right now it is only used during diaper changes since it keeps my daughters well-behaved through those. Otherwise they can handle it and push the buttons with the sound turned off.

Big plastic yellow truck that isceantly yells, "Tonka Street Sweeper, keeping it clean!" over and over and over and over..

How could I forget this one? Sing along if you know it...

"Hop on board the animal train..."

I've successfully managed to avoid anything with batteries. He's still only 2 though, so it probably won't last for too long. When a relative gives an annoying toy that talks or sings or beeps, he plays with it while they are there and then after they leave it slowly disappears. We have a small house in L.A. and neither my husband nor I can handle the noise - the two-year-old is loud enough! What we'll do as he gets older and more aware of what we're doing, I'm not sure.

Chicken Dance and YMCA Elmo... which we own both of. Fortunately they are buried in the depths of the toy box and haven't been taken out in a while.

GG - BWAH! We have that toy. If you breathe on it too hard, it'll turn on. "So much fun to laugh and sing, why don't you come and play with me?" I'll come play with you, you bastard. With my hammer.

I hate the leapfrog radio/jukebox/tool of Satan. It's so fucking loud, and you can restart it by pressing the button, so we have leapfrog rappers "F-f-f-f-f-f is a letter F is a letter - F is a letter" "DAMMIT ALEX, STOP PUSHING THE BUTTON AND JUST LET THE SONG PLAY, OKAY?!?!?!"

we have an elephant named ella, with a little spinny bit in the belly that sings a song when you spin it. "i'm an EL-ephant i stomp all O-ver the place! i can DO lots of THINGS with my EL-e-PHANT FACE!!" then if you ignore it for a second it commands you to "SPIN ME AGAIN!!!!" aagh. we would have gotten rid of it except that the baby uses it to entertain himself in his crib in lieu of screaming. my brother gave it to us as payback for the year i got my nephew a toy accordion.

We have mostly managed to take batteries out of things or conveniently forget they turn on.

I would say the bouncy balls that light up and make siren noises spouse brought home from a conference will do. He promised me I could sleep in the day he came home, after a week of the toddler refusing sleep because he missed his dada. Then he gave them those stupid ass balls.

DGB! OMFG that stupid Fn' train. That's next on our hit list.

So tell me, WTF is with toys now coming in all bright rainbow colors, or pink? Are there really parents who will only buy pink things for their girl, and pass up a toy if it does not come in bubble gum? I think those toys are ugly, not to mention losing out on the stimulation factor of bright, contrasting colors.

HBD- I hate things in primary colors. It's almost insulting. There is a whole spectrum of beautiful colors out there and you chose the basic (read-ugly) red, blue, yellow. Not even nice shades of those colors.

My extended family and my parents can't (or won't) understand my hatred for toys with batteries, lights, sounds, etc. I really hate that they feel the need to make everything talk, squak, speak...

This is why I love wood toys.

ANY of the Elmo dolls. Take your pick.

Any pink-gendered version of ordinary toys like airplanes, lawnmowers, Legos, computers, or T-ball. Don't even get me started.

And, of course, Rose Petal Cottage:

http://tinyurl.com/5wxy4t

DGB - Just take the batteries out!

GAH! THE FUCKING ROSE PETAL COTTAGE!!!!! HATE HATE HATE! Fucking washer and dryer. What the fuck ever. I'm going to buy one for Vampire and tell him that manly men wash and iron and cook, dammit. I've already got Banshee helping with the laundry.

oh god, i saw a commercial for that rose petal bullshit the other day. the life duet is laughing right now, because i made the same sort of preverbal strangled scream clicking on that link as i did the other day.

"where her dreams have room to grow" indeed. *makes marketer-strangling motion with hands* grrr.

Anything that has the independent ability to talk, beep, sing or play canned music. HATE IT. I have a low tolerance for what I think of as random noise (including radio, commercials and other stupidity).

Honestly, when I was your age, we made our OWN noises for our toys, and we LIKED it. My little pony does not need to talk!! Long live Ikea craft supplies, wooden toys and stuffed animals!

I think we have one of those pink cars, given by a friend with daughters. I don't get why girls "need" all pink toys, it's so stupid and limited! Of course, my son doesn't have anything pink, and every time he sees his cousin's pink stuffed animals he's very interested in them. I think it's because he never sees that color.

I can't think of any toy I want to destroy right now. He's still very young.

Floor Pie...would love to take the batteries out, but too many times the Bean is given the offending toys by somebody else and once he knows they make noise, he knows that they need new batteries once they stop making noise. Bugger is too smart.